Forum
Fuck My Life
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nunes wrote
at 10:12 PM, Saturday October 31, 2009 EDT
"Today, my teenage stepdaughters, as a punishment for refusing to buy them iphones, told my wife they saw me in town kissing an attractive blonde and grabbing her ass (all invented). She believed it and i'm single. I've been faithful and feeding the whole family for 10 years. FML"
http://www.fmylife.com/tops |
Replies 1 - 9 of 9
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nunes wrote
at 10:13 PM, Saturday October 31, 2009 EDT "Today, I thought it would be funny to fart in my roommates mouth while he was asleep. I walked over to him and pulled my pyjamas down and let loose. To my surprise it was a very wet one and I accidently took a dump on his face, he woke up and beat me until I was bleeding. FML"
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nunes wrote
at 10:19 PM, Saturday October 31, 2009 EDT "Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read 'Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom.' FML"
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nunes wrote
at 10:20 PM, Saturday October 31, 2009 EDT "Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, 'Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!' He looked at me and replied, 'How about some blue shut the fuck up!'. FML"
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mr Kreuzfeld wrote
at 10:28 AM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST "Today, I was playing a game of truth or dare in a group with a girl I liked. She was dared to kiss me, but then the group decided that that was too cruel of a dare. FML"
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Shevar wrote
at 10:35 AM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST lolz, nice link nunes.
"Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML" |
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TheBetterYodel wrote
at 10:35 AM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST Today, my girlfriend dumped me proclaiming she wanted someone more like her "Edward". I asked her who Edward was. She held up a copy her "Twilight" book. She was talking about a fictional vampire. FML
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zippskie wrote
at 5:52 PM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST happytoscrap: last month i spent over 200 hours playin kdice with a total of 1236 games. FM
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zippskie wrote
at 5:53 PM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST L.
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overeasy wrote
at 7:56 PM, Sunday November 1, 2009 EST "last month played 465 games probably 100 hours playing time. Shut it down 4 days early because I figured 16960 pts is enough for my first trophy. Look today finished 102nd. FML"
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